Desperate Housewife Yes…Wistera Lane? Not So Much…

For the third time in two weeks, a female teacher has been arrested for having a sexual relationship with a male student in our area.  This time it was a bit too close for comfort.  Reporters are now camped outside my daughter’s school and the school Principal is not returning calls. 

 Wake up people….this is real life, not Wisteria Lane.  Although you may be desperate, you are certainly not Eva Longoria having an affair with a young gardener.

What in heaven’s name are these women thinking?  First off, in your forties, why would you endeavor to take on “raising” another child in a sexual relationship?  Secondly, why is the principal not speaking with anyone and not accountable for what happens in his school?  Apparently, he has no problem with reporters hawking students that attend the school as they gather like vultures on the property.

Most importantly, however, is the mentality of the fine upstanding citizens of the Tampa area.  “Good job son” stands among the comments posted on our local news boards.  My young daughter noted the fact that this woman dresses like a twelve year old “Prostitot”, and has young boys gathered around her constantly.  If the students of the school notice this, why did the administration not notice the behavior?

Had the victim had been a seventeen year-old female; the attitude would certainly be different.  There is no difference in the crime due to the gender of the victim.  An adult charged with the care of a minor child violated that trust in the worst way possible.  The courts need to stop the “slap on the wrist” punishment issued to these sexual offenders and toss their delicate little behinds in jail. 

Here, in the year 2008, we are still using a double standard and that is appalling.  A female teacher who has a physical relationship with a minor is just as guilty as a male teacher who does the same.  The crime should not be glorified, nor should any special consideration be given.

Unfortunately, the list of victims affected by the decision this woman made is not limited to the boy.  The woman in custody has a teen-aged daughter that attends the school where she taught.  Acting so irresponsibly as a teacher is a crime, acting that selfishly as a parent is incomprehensible. 

Love As A Concious Decision

Did you ever have a lightbulb moment?  Someone makes a comment and suddenly that comical image appears above your head and sheds 150 watts of brilliant, insightful light on a thought you’ve been struggling to understand for decades.

When I returned to school several years ago, I didn’t have the first clue about the Professors at the College.  I had returned with the intention of obtaining access to a highly revered nursing program.  The first semester back, I decided to take classes I knew I could handle so that I could get used to the demands of being a single parent, who held a full time job and attended school.

I lucked out.  My English Professor was one of the best in the world.  He is the type of teacher that believes that teaching is more than giving you notes.  Dr. Snyder believed in prompting independent and deep thought.

On the first night of class, his announced that there was one perfect being, and He wasn’t sitting in our classroom.  Dr. Snyder did not give A’s.  Rather than allowing my bubble to burst, I worked hard and opened my mind to endless possibilities I would not have conceived six months earlier. 

I discovered many things in this class.  My love of Shakespeare and ability to analyze his works has me convinced that I had to have spent time with the man in a former life.  I discovered that I wrote well, that I thought deeply and that being a nurse was not what I was meant to be.

Most importantly on that first night, Dr. Snyder, while discussing the deeper meanings in works of literature brought up the novel Tess D’Ubervilles.  An eighteenth century french work, it was rather racy for the time period.  A peasant becomes impregnated outside of marriage and gives birth to a bastard son.  When she breaks free of her servitude and the “employer” that fathered the child, she meets a man and they are eventually married.  Tess hid her son for the duration of the relationship and finally revealed his existance after the marriage. 

Her husband was so infuriated that he left her.  She returned to a life of servitude, financial struggles and miserably low social status.

Many years later, her husband returns to the village.  Tess cordially welcomes him into her home, preparing his meal, a warm bath and his bed.

He asked her then “How can you treat me so kindly after what I have done to you?” 

Tess simply replies “Once having decided to love you, I will love you forever”

That is one of the greatest lines in Literature.  Love is a conscious decision.  It is not something we stumble or fall into.  It is something that grows, that forgives and most importantly…endures.

That night Dr. Snyder changed my life.  I knew that I would never again settle or mistake attraction for love.  I knew that when I did give of myself, it would be one hundred percent, and it would be forever.

I attained that desperately sought after A, but more importantly I have learned to look beyond the words, into the mind of a writer, and into my own soul.